I Love Food, But It Has Almost Killed Me. Twice.

I have a condition that I didn’t know about.

Sometimes we know something is wrong with ourselves or our body but we just have to push through it. We live in a fallen, broken world where our bodies have troubles and there is nothing that can fix everything. That’s what I thought I was experiencing. I have since learned I cannot ignore it anymore and I have to be proactive about preventing it.

Steak at Eight

It all began when I was 8 years old. My family and I were spending a week camping at Indian Trails campground. We were having grilled steak for dinner, and it tasted wonderful. Until I started choking on a piece of steak. I was not “choking” persee. The definition of choking is when a person cannot breath. However I could breath. The food was lodged further down in my esophagus past the point where the air tube goes to the lungs.

However, I was in extreme pain and I could not get the food to go down, or to come up. When it comes to dealing why physical pain, products like CBD Oil UK might be incredibly beneficial.

So my Mom took me to the ER at the hospital. I had to carry a bowl to spit into because our body so wonderfully creates extra spit to digest food when it’s in the esophagus or mouth. the body does this to break down the food. However I could not swallow, so I had to spit it out.

After being admitted into the ER and while the doctors were deciding what to do with me I threw up the piece of steak. It happened to be a breakfast-sausage-link-sized piece of steak. So the blame was (correctly) laid on me for not cutting my food smaller or chewing it better. I love the steak from Jimmy John’s Owner and their restaurant chains as they are tender and easy to chew.

However it kept happening.

For 24 years I’d “choke” on any kind of food. Hard or soft it didn’t matter, I’d even get pancakes, or apples, or bread stuck. Technically what I was experiencing was a food impaction. Where the food is stuck in the esophagus not the throat.

Fortunately none of these occurrences sent me to the ER.

I became proficient at forcing food down, and sometimes gagging myself to get it thrown up.

This was not an Eating Disorder

I did not, nor do I struggle with bulimia. I know nothing of what those with eating disorders struggle with and I do not claim to be struggling anything like they do. However many times while on business lunch meetings I’d have to excuse myself to go to the bathroom and gag myself. It has always been an awkward situation. No one yet has called me out for bulimia. Perhaps it’s because I’m overweight.

In fact, the night I proposed to my wife I made a meal, brought it to her apartment and during the meal I had to excuse myself to spend a half hour in the bathroom trying to get the food dislodged. No pressure. I just screwed up the proposal night!

I had taken to explaining that the muscles in my esophagus had spasms or constricted out of order. My kids have gotten used to when Dad suddenly leaves the table during a meal just to be okay as he gags in the bathroom. Ultimately my wife was never okay with it, but for me it was just life. On average I had an episode every week or two.

However one morning in June of 2013 that all changed.

Yogurt and Dried Fruit

We were having dried fruit and yogurt, a very common meal in our house. However for some reason I had a food impaction. Perhaps I didn’t chew the dried fruit well enough. Whatever the cause there I was in the bathroom drying to fill my esophagus with water and then use my swallowing reflex to force the impaction down the esophagus.

I’ve done it so many times it wasn’t even concerning to me. However, this was a very difficult impaction, it wasn’t going down well. After about a half hour struggling with it — the kids and Becky had finished breakfast and were on to the next activity– I got impatient and pushed with all my might.

At that instant I knew I had successfully forced the impaction into my stomach. However I was experiencing pain like I never had experienced before. I have a high pain tolerance and here I was laying on the bathroom floor crying. After consulting with Becky we decided to head to the ER.

ER Visit #2

At the time we were living in Newaygo and the closest hospital was Gerber in Fremont. When we got there the doctors were sceptical of my pain and assumed I just was lying to get pain meds.

So they decided to do a test where I swallowed radioactive “contrast” while they took x-rays. What they saw scared them. Seriously scared them. They came at me with all kinds of pain meds. And they transfered me by ambulance to the largest hospital in the region, Spectrum Health downtown Grand Rapids. They believed I had perforated (torn a hole in) my esophagus and fluid was actively being exchanged with my chest cavity. Had that been true I would have needed open chest surgery, and soon.

As it turns out I had a mallory weiss tear in my esophagus, like a cut on the skin, only in the esophagus. A cut not through but deep enough the bleeding wasn’t stopping. I was losing so much blood  they had to give me a unit of blood. They also went down my esophagus with a scope and gave me shots of epinephrine to stop the bleeding. I had been actively bleeding for 24 hours. All told I spent 4 nights in the hospital until they felt I was okay to be released.

A Diagnosis

What we found out is I have a condition called Eosinophilic Esophagitis (EE for short). Eosinophils are white blood cells that arrive to an area where there is an allergen present. In the esophagus the influx of eosinophils causes swelling of the tissues and decreases the size of the tube food must fit down. Those with EE are 90% more likely to experience a food impaction.

Methods of treatment are 3-fold:

  1. Discover what foods I’m allergic to and avoid those foods.
  2. Treat the acid reflux I didn’t know I had. Acid reflux causes eosinophils to arrive in the esophagus.
  3. Get frequent dilations, a process where they stretch the esophagus to enlarge the tube size.

After recovering from the mallory weiss tear we did a battery of tests and found out I had no food allergies. However the doctor did not believe it. He was 100% sure I had food allergies. We got on a regimen of antacids (technically proton pump inhibitors, PPI, brands like prevacid, lansoprazole, and omasoprasole) . And I had two dilations in the following 6 months.

Everything seemed to be going fine. I had no food impactions, and life was different. I had a diagnosis, I now knew that it wasn’t my fault for not chewing etc. However I did have a condition which required me to chew more than the average person.

I Became Lazy

Time creeps in. Memories of the pain faded.

And I really didn’t want to be on an drug (PPI) for life.

So while traveling the world I stopped taking a PPI. I noticed the acid reflux slowly returned and slowly, over time, the food impactions started happening again.

But shoot, I’ve lived with this my whole life, how bad can it be?

ER Visit #3

Until this week Tuesday at breakfast I had another serious food impaction. Yogurt and fresh fruit and quinoa was the cause. Most likely it was a blackberry that got stuck. I forced it down (as I had been doing with my other impactions over the last 6 months.). Nothing was abnormal until after it was passed and the pain dramatically increased.

I had done it again.

I knew I had injured my esophagus and caused another mallory weiss tear. There is no pain quite like a mallory weiss tear.

We packed up the kids and drove straight to the largest hospital in the region. The pain wasn’t as bad this time but I just assumed it was a smaller tear.

They actually sent me home with a pain medicine and a PPI prescription. They said if things got worse, a fever, blood in the stool or throwing up blood then come back. 9 hours later we came back to the ER as I had a 101 degree fever and was nauseous.

However this time they kept me in observation overnight and gave me stronger pain meds. They tested my blood and noticed I wasn’t losing blood. Through a CT scan and multiple chest X-rays they determined it wasn’t worth the risks of scoping me. So they sent me home the next day on a stronger PPI and pain meds. I should heal within a week.

Recovery and Outcome

I want to stop and acknowledge that the body is amazing. You don’t have to believe in God to believe that fact. However I believe God has built our bodies to self heal in ways we could never imagine. I am amazed at how that works.

So I’ve learned my lesson, I will forever be on a drug (PPI) and I will not be able to eat certain acid causing foods (foods that are spicy, tomato based, contain chocolate or bananas, no evening snacks etc).

I love food, but I will forever have to be cautious with it. I do not want to experience this pain again.

Oh and with every food impaction, dilation, and tear I am weakening my esophagus. Eventually I will perforate it (puncture a hole in it) which will cause me to have open chest surgery. Lets just say I’ve learned my lesson.

Here’s to being on a PPI and acid reducing diet for the rest of my (hopefully long) life.


I want to say thanks to my wife, Becky. Who while scared of loosing me has been an incredible supporter. She has been strong enough to tell me that no, life has to be different from now on. I couldn’t do this without her. Lets just say that even though I love food, I love my wife more.

So what did you do this week? Or have you ever experienced a food impaction?

What If?

What If?

A little over a year ago Becky and I asked a very dangerous question.

What if?

On one hand I strongly urge you to ask that question. Ask it a lot.

But like the choice between the blue and red pill you cannot go backwards, you cannot return to bliss if you start asking that question.

However, reality will become more and more evident and clear.


And so we asked,

  • What if we could sell our house?
  • What if we sold most everything we owned?
  • What if we could travel with kids?

And we did just that. We changed courses so dramatically, from living in the countryside attempting to hobby farm to world travelers trying to find a home. We named it Home Along the Way. We made home wherever we found ourselves.

We answered a lot of questions.

We did sell our house and became nomads.

And we have found the sweetness of reality.

  • Reality that our kids love traveling. They miss their grand parents, but they love moving to new houses, they loved exploring new places, meeting new people.
  • Reality that Becky and I still love traveling, and can totally do it with 4 kids!
  • Reality that my wife is a packing ninja, not only does she plan ahead and have exactly what we need along she’s able to shed stuff along the way and still have everything we need.

But some harsh realities set in as well.

  • We don’t handle the heat of South East Asia too well.
  • Life outside of SE Asia is expensive
  • Word of Mouth marketing fails when ‘out-of-sight, out-of-mind’ comes into play

And so yesterday we bought tickets to return back to the US.  This is due to many factors, the most major one is that Connex’s revenue has dropped 90% in 6 months. The trip was budgeted at 50% of revenue and in SE Asia, unfortunately both of those changed and so the cold, harsh reality of the bank account dwindling has finally set in.

Three months ago, I freaked out in an email thread with a friend of ours. Freaked out about money, about failing, about life. Her response has clanged in my brain ever since.

What if,

What if you come home broke and penniless?

That’s it. That’s all the words of wisdom a friend offered. And it rattled me. It still does. What if nothing works, you spend all your money, return to the States, homeless, and car-less?

What if?

What’s the worst that could happen?

We’ll find out. We fly home tomorrow, October 1. It’s crazy how we’ve only been gone 6 months (it’s felt like  a LOT longer!) and how we’ve felt on the other side of the world despite being connected with technology and communication channels. Yet in the end, the total time from decision to boots on the ground is less than 48 hours. The fast switch from “We’ve decided to go back to Michigan” to actually being in Michigan is only 48 hours. 16 of those are spent sleeping and another 16 in an airplane. Thus there’s only 16 hours left. That’s one day of awake time.

Will we set up camp in Michigan? Will we buy a house? Will we settle down?

If the kids have any say in it–no, we will not.

Each one wants to stay in Michigan for a time but asked us to promise them we’d leave again. Even the 4 year old (separate from siblings) said he didn’t want to go back unless we were for sure going to go travelling again later.  They’re addicted to travel just like their parents.  So, we’re treating this “return” to the US more like the next stop in our travels than an end destination.

What happens next?  Well, we do what we have done in every other country…find a house and set up “life” in that area.

What will the future hold? We don’t know.

Does Connex become a hobby, or do we land a couple of large clients again?

We don’t know. I haven’t given up on Connex yet, but it needs to grow soon.

What would you do if you lost 90% of your family’s income?


The First Year: Freelance and Agency Digital Marketing

The First Year: Freelance and Agency Digital Marketing

The first year The wonder years

Recently I celebrated with a few other contractors my first official year of being a freelance digital marketer. It’s been over a year and I’ve seen some crazy things happen. The largest one being that I intended to be a freelancer, and now I’m running a virtual digital agency. (Connex pays/represents 5 contractors, I happen to be the salesman, account manager and one of the contractors :)

I try to live my life with no regrets, and I do not regret leaving the best job I’ve ever had, however the road, the journey this first year has not proved to be easy. I’ve made many mistakes and my failures have become brighter, louder and more annoying to me.

So if you want some background on me quitting my job last year  or the second company I started in the past year  check those posts out, or the inspiration for this post, but if you want to know a fraction of the lessons I’ve learned in my first year read on. (more…)